FROM THE AUTHOR: It's taken me more than ten years to write this book. I wrote it and rewrote it until I was happy. Now it's your turn to be happy - and you only have to read it once. Afterwards, I think you'll agree: You can't be serious! Read about... * an unorthodox teaching career featuring carnivorous students, unruly parents - and Goldberg. * a misguided ROTC cadet who valiantly captured the wrong hill. * the decline and fall of daily conversation - and stuff like that. * how the cell phone has become our weapon of choice. * the naked truth about family vacations. (Do you prefer bare or bear?) * why yoga's Downward Dog may leave you barking up the wrong tree. * how the Marlboro Man morphed into E.D. Man. * some questionable medical breakthroughs - As Seen on TV. But wait, there's more!